


Oh, Is That All

by lastyoungrene_gay_de



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Saving the World, Swearing, a lot of five and klaus talking, five caring and klaus not shutting up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:28:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28320921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastyoungrene_gay_de/pseuds/lastyoungrene_gay_de
Summary: Say Diego didn't out of jail when Five and Klaus were getting ready to go out and save the world on their own... here's a fun conversation they could have had.(for the tua gift exchange on tumblr)
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy & Klaus Hargreeves
Comments: 2
Kudos: 70





	Oh, Is That All

**Author's Note:**

> this is for user aghostfromtheages as part of the tua holiday gift exchange on tumblr. They like Five and Klaus and opposites working together and I couldn't get this out of my head. Hope you enjoy.

Five knocked on the door before pushing it open and quickly walking inside. He approached Klaus, who was lying on his bed, dressed in only his leather pants with stitching up the sides revealing the skin on the outside of his legs that he’d been wearing most of the time since Five had gotten back, twisting purple yarn around a single knitting needle. The other had impaled the yarn ball that was sitting on Klaus’ bare chest. Five wonder vaguely what the hell he was doing when Klaus started flailing around wildly, twisting the string up even more than it already was. 

“Hey. Get up. We’re going,” he decided to stay instead of even touching Klaus’ mess. 

“Where?” he asked. 

“To save the world,” Five said, as if it was obvious. And it should have been; it was all he’d been talking about for days. 

“Oh, is that all?” Klaus asked sarcastically, then dejectedly added, “Great.” 

Five began pacing up and down Klaus’ room. “So, Pogo said dad killed himself to get us all back together, right?” 

“Yeah, so?” 

Five spun around, arms and ends of his academy blazer flying out at his sides as he answered. “ _ So _ , it got me thinking. I had to jump to the future to figure out when it happened, but Dad, he can’t time travel,” he explained. “So how’d the crazy bastard actually know to kill himself  _ a week _ before the end of the world?” 

“Well, ya know-” Klaus started, but Five cut him off quickly. 

“Don’t answer. That was purely rhetorical,” he said. Klaus slumped over, forearms resting on his thighs as he looked ahead with an annoyed glare. 

Five continued to pace. “Truth is, our whole lives, he’s been telling us we’d save the world from an impending apocalypse.” 

“Yeah, but I thought he just said that to scare us into doing the dishes,” Klaus sighed and pulled a shoe onto one of his feet, sticking his leg up in the air rather than leaning over to put it on. 

“Me too,” Five said, surprised and unexpectedly excited that he and Klaus thought the same thing. “But what if the old man really knew it was going to happen?”

“Yeah, but knew  _ how?” _ Klaus asked and finally stood up from his bed. He leaned down and picked up a shirt from the floor as Five continued. 

“No idea. But the fact remains his fakakta plan worked: we all came home,” he said as his brother sniffed the shirt he’d just picked up. He must have deemed it clean enough to wear since he pulled it down over his head to cover his chest. “Since we’re here, we might as well save the world.” Five turned to walk out of the room after dropping his dramatic line.

“Oh, yeah? What, like the two of us?” Klaus waved his hand to gesture between the two of them as he followed after him. 

“Uh, well, ideally, no,” Five admitted easily with a tilt of his head, as if it was nothing more than an inconvenience that things weren’t going his way. He was used to it at this point. “But… gotta work with what I’ve got.”

“Alrighty,” Klaus said cheerfully from behind him. Five turned to look at him and saw him bouncing along, waving his arms around as he walked to match the cheery tone of voice. Five had to make a serious effort to not roll his eyes. “What’s the plan? Do you have a plan? You said nothing came from that eye thing right? Are you sure you can’t get anything else from that? Oh, and did you ever find out who that guy from that paper you brought home was? Did you do anything with ‘im? What about-” 

“Klaus, I say this with as much brotherly affection- or whatever- as possible,” five sighed as they made their way to the front door. “But shut up.” 

“Wow. Rude,” Klaus drolled from behind him, but did actually stop talking. 

As they left the Academy and made their way to the car Five tried to find a way to explain this all to Klaus without it taking all day. Maybe Klaus could even help if he got enough of the fucking thing across clear enough. He hadn’t needed much information to make their trip to Meritech somewhat productive. Sure, it hadn’t panned out but it wasn’t Klaus’ fault the information he actually got them didn’t lead anywhere. Five also wasn’t the biggest fan of being hit in the mouth like that, but it got them somewhere. 

“Jenkins was Vanya’s boyfriend,” Five blurted as he opened the car door and slid into the driver’s seat. 

“Ex-squeeze me?” Klaus asked as he dropped into his seat without questioning the arrangement. 

“The guy who came to the house the other day with Vanya?  _ Is _ Herold Jenkins,” Five clarified as he turned the key in the ignition. Klaus just looked at him for a moment, blinking blanking once or twice, before giggling and letting his head roll back against the headrest of his seat. 

“Of fucking course,” he forced through his laughter after a moment. Five rolled his eyes and put the car in gear. After a minute, Klaus finally stopped laughing and asked, “So what’s the plan? What exactly are we doing?” 

“When we checked his file from the police, I-” 

“Who’s we?” Klaus interrupted, turning to him again. 

Five furrowed his eyebrows and took his eyes off the road for a second to look at him incredulously. “Wha- Me, Allison, and Diego. Why?” He looked back ahead through the windshield. 

Klaus shrugged. “Seemed relevant.” 

“It’s not,” Five snapped. 

“Sorry,” Klaus said sarcastically. Five could see him out of the corner of his eye, pinching his face into a kind of mocking expression. “I’m not exactly all knowing. I’m not that bitchy little black and white girl on a bike.” 

“Wha-” Five started then shook his head. “Nevermind. Not now.” 

“‘Kay,” Klaus simply and leaned forward in his seat, reaching out to fiddle with the radio. 

“Really, I’m trying to explain and you’re gonna turn the radio on?”

“I can’t focus in silence.” 

Five rolled his eyes. “When I was looking at his file with Allison and Diego I saw he has another house in a smaller town outside the city. I don’t know the exact address because they disappeared with the file, but we’ll find it somehow.” 

“Yeah,” Klaus agreed. “If one of us is involved at all god knows shit’s gonna hit the fan pretty quickly.” 

“Yeah, we need to find them  _ before _ that happens,” Five said. 

“Why?” Klaus asked simply. 

“Are you kidding? Or are you being serious right now?” Five asked. “Why can’t we let our siblings cause a scene while we’re being searched for by a timeless organization that’s trying to ensure the end of the world? That is the number one way to get caught and make sure that it fucking happens.” 

Klaus shrugged. “I just kinda wanna see how fucked up shit can get. Don’t you?” 

“No!” Five yelled. “I already know! And it’s not fucking good!” 

“How bad can it be?” 

“Very!” Five insisted. 

“Can it  _ really _ ?”

“Klaus I will crash the car.” 

“No you won’t,” Klaus teased and reached for the radio dial again. “You care about us all too much to do something like that.” Five floundered, opening and closing his mouth trying to come up with a response for that. “Oh come on,” Klaus cooed and reached out and tapped the tip of his nose. Five smacked his hand away but all that did was make Klaus laugh. “Really? You’re gonna go all ‘lone wolf’ on us now? After coming back to stop the end of the world so we don’t all die you’re gonna try that.” Five scoffed and shook his head, pressing his foot on the gas pedal a little harder. “I get it. You don’t want us to know you care. I won’t say anything.” 

Five finally spoke again a moment later when Klaus propped his feet up on the dashboard in front of him. “Would you put your feet down? If something happens your legs’ll snap.” 

“Aww, there you go,” Klaus teased. “Worrying again.” 

“Would you shut up, Klaus?” 

“Only if we do this my way.” 

“And what exactly is your way?” Five asked and turned to glare at him for a second before looking back at the road. “Running around, fucking shit up, and hoping it all ends up working out somehow?” 

“Well, usually I don’t really care if it doesn’t work out, so…” 

“Klaus, you are  _ not _ helping your case.” 

“Either lighten up or get used to the sound of my voice, dear brother,” Klaus crooned. Five grimaced. “Boo,” Klaus complained. “Christ, man, who put a stick up your ass?” 

“The evil, time travelling organization that wants us all dead,” Five deadpanned. 

“I still don't know anything about that,” Klaus whined. 

“Well, we haven’t exactly had the time to go over it, have we?” 

“Lighten up.”

“I will when we save the world.” 

“Why does everything you do have to be so serious?” 

“I don’t have time to be anything but.” 

“Time travel is  _ LITERALLY _ one of your powers!” Klaus said exasperatedly and threw his hands up. 

“And that clearly worked out the last few times I did it on my own.” 

“Ehh, you’ll figure it out.” 

“Oh, how do you know that?”

“You want to,” Klaus shrugged. Five was getting tired of Klaus shrugging. “I never wanted to. And here we are; you trying to save the world and me not really giving a shit. If you manage to or not. You’ll figure it out.” 

Five hoped he was right. 

**Author's Note:**

> i hope this was a decent gift. if anyone else read this my tumblr is @ lastyoungrene-gay-de i love talking about tua


End file.
